Nacho-isms: An anthology of terms

What does Nachos do when he has a spare moment before he has to recharge his crazy n00b-owning batteries in the time-wasting exercise otherwise known as sleep? Why, he knocks together some piece of writing for you lovely DLC fans to read. So instead of doing the same old unoriginal affair of news, reviews or (gaming gods forbid) an opinion piece (because you all know that I’m rather shy to express my opinions), I thought I’d start committing to digital paper the many terms that have developed over the course of my illustrious and mostly unpaid gaming career.

Some are inspired by people I know or have been created in a collaboration with such folk, but you can guarantee yourself one simple thing: if they’re awesome enough to earn the ‘Nacho-ism’ stamp of approval, then you know they’re only a gaming community’s game of Chinese Whispers short of mainstream use.

I’ll update this article every once in a while, either when a new term is born, when I remember one that I haven’t used in a while, or maybe even when I pluck a Nacho-ism out of the ether. So without further ado and in no particular order, I give you the start of something beautiful: Nacho-isms 101.

McConaughey (verb)

By far the most popular and widely spread Nacho-ism to date, the term is part of a series that was lifted from extravagant kills/death in certain movies. In this instance ‘McConaughey’ or ‘The McConaughey’, if you prefer its more formal title, was inspired by the scene in Reign of Fire whereby Matthew McConaughey launches himself at a fast-approaching dragon with his trusty battle axe. He knows he’s dead, the audience knows he’s toast, and even the dragon is salivating at the prospect of nomming on McConaughey’s foray into the world of action films.

What does that even mean?

McConaughey’s balls-to-the-walls mentality and willingness to go out like a hero was all the inspiration required to convert this into a practical gaming term. Usually used in reference to a first- or third-person title, The McConaughey is a manoeuvre that requires a ballsy player seeking fortune and glory to run straight at an enemy. If they’re shooting at you, it makes at an even more badass McConaughey. The trick is to jump and kill your opponent with a melee weapon, but the all-important factor is to scream ‘MCCONAUGHEY’ as you do it. After all, the world must be enlightened.

Uses: McConaughey, The McConaughey, McConaughey’d, McConaugheying

Seagal (verb)

Another movie term that hasn’t spread as far as the fabled McConaughey (yet, give it time), this term was inspired by one of the few truly great Steven Seagal films: Under Siege. The scene in question is towards the end when Tommy Lee Jones and Seagal enter a mano-e-mano battle to see whose hair is slicker. Names are called, knives are pulled and it ends in one of the most brutal overkills of a character I’ve ever seen. Tommy Lee Jones has his eye brutally gouged. Dead, right? Wrong. He then has a knife shoved into his head. Surely that’s over, right? Nope. Seagal then throws him headfirst into a nearby monitor.

What does that even mean?

Seagal doesn’t believe in finishing perforating fools in half measures. He believes that if you’re gonna kill a sucka, then you’d best make sure he’s dead three times over. This term can be applied to any gaming situation where you can kill stuff and kill it some more. For example, get an enemy to low health and then shotgun him in the head, followed by melee attacking his falling corpse and drop a grenade on his corpse for good measure. The Seagal is particularly satisfying manoeuvre to pull on nemeses or dirty scoundrel campers.

Uses: Seagal, The Seagal, Seagal’d (as a retrospective term, it’s hard to call a Seagal as it’s happening, hence no ‘Seagaling’)

Irwin (verb)

A touch on the ‘too soon?’ controversial side of things but this term is derived from none other than the awesomely infamous Steve Irwin… yes, the guy who hunted crocodiles. For those unaware, Irwin’s most famous party trick was donning a pair of khaki shorts with a matching khaki shirt taken from a wardrobe of identical khaki clothes and jumping on the back of big, angry crocodiles. It was at this point that he usually got a whole bunch of other mad folk to follow suit and they then tied down and relocated the angry croc that was most probably destined to be luggage or a really fancy pair of boots.

What does that even mean?

Any game that allows you to jump onto the back of some sort of some unsuspecting (or hell, even suspecting) soon-to-be-worm-food mofo is exactly when this term should be used. Truth be told, the most accurate and entertaining way I’ve ever used this term was when a friend and I were playing Turok (the recent one) many, many moons ago and jumping on the backs of dinosaurs as they ran past and stabbing them to gruesome death. Colour me sadistic, but it was always the most entertaining when performed on the so-called innocent herbivores.

Uses: Irwin, Irwin’d, Irwining, FTI (which is, of course, short for ‘For The Irwin)

In case you’ve forgotten by the end of these awesome entries, there will be more to follow as I remember or invent them. Rest assured that if this article is updated, it’ll be plonked back on the front page of the website for your viewing pleasure.

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  • Snake

    Nacho I curse the day you taught Dave “The McConaughey”. One day I'll return the favor to you both. lol

  • Nachos Justice

    You will try…

  • Snake

    I will return the favor with the first of the Snake-isms.
    The first is a counter to “The McConaughey” named “Eat This!” performed with a close range headshot with a shotgun shouting “Eat This!”aka Hicks in the Aliens movie. This is the perfect counter to “The McConaughey” to headshot the flying body before they strike. I believe this to be closer to the movie as the dragon ate McConaughey

  • Nachos Justice

    I McConaughey n00bs like you for breakfast! Bring your shotgun… it'll make things more interesting.

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